How to Disconnect From Yourself (Without Noticing You Are) A 3 Part Series. Part 1.
How to Disconnect From Yourself (Without Noticing You Are) A 3 Part Series. Part 1.
Losing yourself in the thickness of busy and hurry, forgetting who you are and remembering again.
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Hurry is the root of all suffering. It’s the reason we can be surrounded by so many people, the reason why we can have the entire network of the world at our fingertips, the reason why we can be connected to millions and be up to date on all the latest news, so plugged in, yet so lonely. It’s the reason why we replaced real human interactions with the convenience of phones, technology, self-check out lines, and AI. It’s the reason why we replaced slow loving home cooked meals with processed packaged foods that we can microwave for 2 minutes or go to drive-ins that take 5. It’s the reason why we choose diet pills and quick fixes over sustainable eating and exercising.
Hurry is the reason why we’ve become so abbreviated in our relationships, why we kiss and hug less than we used to, why we stopped looking into each other’s eyes when we’re talking, why we became less sincere, less present. Hurry is the reason coffee spills, cars crash and accidents happen. Hurry is the reason why we spit out words we don’t mean, hurt people we love and live with the guilt from it. It’s the reason why we wake up to panic attacks at 3 AM in the morning and have unbearable anxiety throughout the day. It’s the reason why we breathe shallowly from our chest versus deeply from our bellies.
Hurry is the reason why burn out is at an all time high.
It’s sneaky and addicting.
Hurry is the root of all suffering and it’s destroying us.
You disconnect from yourself by living a life of hurry.
You disconnect from yourself by thinking that you have no time, that you need to rush to get some distant future or else you’ll miss out. You have time. No matter how much society tries to fool you into thinking that you don’t; you have time. They say life is short but truly, life is long. Within every moment lies an entire lifetime. Once you realize this, you will understand how abundant your time truly is. No matter if you’re 23 or 83 — every breath you take is filled with infinite opportunities; to create, to express yourself, to walk with purpose, to learn something new about yourself, to learn how to forgive, to learn how to love and be loved, to do the things you’ve always wanted to do but were too afraid to do. You have time so take your time. You’re allowed to slow down. Breathe and slow down. You’re allowed to unsubscribe from any cultural belief that tells you you’re going to fall behind because you choose to take it easy and take better care of yourself.
You don’t need to follow the mold that the world has modeled for you. You’re allowed to do less, to make time for “empty” days with no plans, no meetings, no projects— so you can fill yourself up. You’re allowed to say no to anything that doesn’t light your bones up, that doesn’t set your soul on fire. You are allowed to relax. You are not selfish by choosing to live your life in a more intentional and relaxed way. You don’t have to rush through all your big feelings and big emotions. When you don’t give yourself time to process your big feelings, it stays within you and you will take it out on the people who love you most. You will be angry with yourself. It will be a perpetual hamster wheel until you slow down enough to process. When you live a life of hurry, you have a hard time being vulnerable because how can you share with others what you’re too afraid of to face yourself? So tell yourself today, that it’s okay to live gently, it’s okay to live softly, it’s okay to live slowly.
You are not behind.
Actually, Darlin’
You are right on time.
You disconnect from yourself by not accepting who you are while honoring who you are becoming.
The one most inevitable truth is that everything in this world is subject to change or decay. You are allowed to change. You do not have to cling to the parts of you that feel so familiar just because those parts of you kept you safe while you were trying to survive. You can leave behind the toxic parts that brought you comfort because it was all was you knew. You can transform them into something new.
The pain of attachment is deeper than the pain of leaving your comfort zone.
You can go on now. You can grow. You can grow into the person you were meant to become. You can trust in God’s mighty hand and know that it is guiding you somewhere far beyond what you thought was possible — far beyond what you even knew to ask for. You can grow into strength and into courage. You can grow in a way that makes your younger self so proud. You can embrace who you are right now, your flaws, your imperfections, your mistakes, your failures while honoring who you are becoming. Like the leaves on the trees, the blades of the grass, the petals on the flowers, or the clouds in the sky — you are subject to change and that’s the most beautiful thing about your human nature. Honor who you are and who you are becoming. Accept it and witness all the ways your life will begin to bless you.
You disconnect from yourself by saying yes to things you don’t actually care about.
You don’t have to say yes just because you think it’s going to please someone. You can say no to anything that doesn’t serve you. No. Not “No because X,Y,Z” but
No(.)
with a period at the end.
Especially to those who have taken advantage of your yes-ness that you’ve bent your back so many times it’s on the verge breaking. You’re allowed to say.. “No. No, thank you.” You can say no to what doesn’t fill your cup, what doesn’t bring you joy or fulfillment. You’re allowed to choose things that fill your soul up so much that your joy starts to overflow and reaches everyone around you— everyone in your family, every stranger that you walk by — without saying a word. If a relationship isn’t serving you, you can learn to accept people for who they are — but just because you accept them, doesn’t mean you have tolerate them or keep them in your life. Your joy takes up so much space that you cannot be ignored and just by being in your presence, they feel joy too.
You’re allowed to speak up for yourself, the inner 8 year old in you, that wanted so badly to say something and to be heard. You can listen to that version of you. You can take action. And you will heal. You will meet a part of yourself that you never knew existed. Maybe you knew deep down, but you never acknowledged it was there. You will create space to welcome people, places, situations into your life that wouldn’t have happened otherwise if you gave your yes away to things you don’t actually care about. Just because it made sense for everyone else— doesn’t mean it has to make sense for you. You will feel guilty. You will feel bad. But at the end of your life, when it’s just you—ready to go on the most epic adventure with God— you will look back at those times, and you will not regret it. You will never regret honoring yourself. You will never regret honoring your heart.
You will never regret honoring your well-being.
Stay tuned for Part II. 🍵
See you soon,
Sandy